When the nice folks at Wooster asked me to
document the typical day of my life, I wasn’t too sure because everydays really
different, I’m never home, and people don’t believe half of the shit I tell them
anyways, so I just finished a huge job for heid fleiss, returned home after
months and figured I’d document a wednsday my most typical day because of comics
and hot dogs tocontrast all the surrealness of life on the road. So I charged my
camera and took it with me everywhere this last wednsday, so here’s my day. Like
I tell everyone ,I make it a point in my life to at least once a day if I do
nothing else to at least draw or write at least one line or scribble or play at
least one note of music. So I do. Sad thing is I probably spend more time on the
phone asking people where the fuck is my money, as I do at the drawing board or
behind the drum kit.
As a slum lord once told me, real g’s don’t get up
before noon, my whole life I’ve worked hard to get to a place In my life where I
don’t have to wake up before noon, and now I’m here and I love it, sleeping in
is the best shit in the universe and I sleep in everyday!!!

1)When I
wake up I’m usually not hungry because I usually eat a gigantic meal right
before I go to sleep, so I take this huge cocktail of vitamins to help with my
OCD, ADD , and clinical depression, with a cup of water and then take a huge
shit down the hall with a newspaper.

2)The guy living at my loft,
sleeping under my trampoline, is filmmaker harry kim, he made ashort ten minute
movie about me two years ago ,and has been following it up with a full length
feature, so he’s been following me with that fucking camera the whole time, only
thing is he has no funding and his parents don’t like the fact that their son is
spending his whole life making a movie about a guy that destroys the earths
surface , my place is big , so he’s here with me now, I introduce him to
everyone as my documentater but he’s always drunk, asleep , or dancing with
girls ,so I spend more time documentating him these day . I keep telling him he
hasn’t earned the right to sleep in yet.

3) I fire up the playstation
and play the best/worst thing in the universe, GRAND THEFT AUTO SAN ANDREAS
nothing makes you more anti-social than this thing. I’ve had it since it came
out and have yet to pass one mission. I start each day by killing at least 100
people I shoot them repeatedy in their genitals with an AK-47 even after they’re
already dead, when I was staying at my cousins house my 7 year old nephew walked
in one me while I was doing this. It was not a good scene. But the true diamond
in this game is the photographing option, as an illustrator I’ve sort of had to
become a photographer by necessity for a lot of the shit I have to photo
reference, but I would never call myself a photographer. But in this world I am
the greatest photographer in the universe. I’ll spend hours, days in this game
trying to get the right shot, I’ll picture it in my head and then spend hours
trying to make it happen. I’ll want it at a certain time of day with the light
just right, like a burning wall of flame in front of me from
molotav
cocktails, with a full moon in the background and at least two spotlights from 2
different helicopters, with dark shiloettes behind the wall of flame shooting at
me, of shot’s of people wile they are stabbing and shooting me in the face,
where else can you do this?location has to be
perfect, sometimes I’ll want
a certain characrter in a certain shot so I’ll punch him/her and have them chase
me on foot all the way from l.a. to las vegas, or I won’t have enough light so
I’ll steal 5 cars and place them strategically to get the lighting I want. My
favorite photo is the jellyfish in the ocean ,but there was no good way to
photograph underwater so it took me three days to figure this out, but I put the
floating car cheat code in which makes the headlights point downwards and I
parked it over the jellyfish illuminating them and I snapped the golden picture,
another thing is after you murder your models for a shot you have a limited time
before they dissapear, I figured out the only way to make them stay forever is
to run them over with a car expertly so that they fly up and then land on top of
the car if they land on top of the car they will stay on screen forever, once I
do this I put the invisible car cheat code in and set up shots, here’s a good
one with some gangbangers shooting at my face while my model seems to be
floating in front of them and what looks like gas escaping from her pussy ends
up being smoke from my invisible car shooting up because I crashed it. it takes
so much memory to save photo’s I had to go to fry’s and buy 4 more memory cards
I have more than 200 amazing
photographs to date.

5)There’s a
knock on the door, it’s joseph, I turn off the playstation , I didn’t think I
would be teaching until I was really old and have something to teach, but by
fate ,god put joeseph in my life, joe is a special kid he’s 15 years old doesn’t
say much, autistic, and one of the best painters I know, I’ve painted with a lot
of people this year and no one paints faster than me than joe. This guy can
paint anything from memory and comes up with the craziest comics, I’d actually
have to say I don’t teach him shit, I learn more just by watching him, all I do
is set up the canvas and mix his paint, look at this noahs ark he did in like
five seconds with every single animal in the world, check out how big those
fucking deer are ,awesome! Class is two hours and only twice a week, besides joe
I have no other responsibilities in my life. Party on!

4)It’s
starting to drizzle, I take a picture of this shedding tree outside, it reminds
me of the artfag project I’m working on, my dandruff didn’t go away after I got
out of prison with head and shoulders and selsum blue and so like ally sheedy
from the breakfast club I shake my flakes onto this black board with matte
medium everyday, it’s taking shape but after this year it’s gonna be a snowstorm
in the city you can kind of start to tell already.

6)Harrys finally
up and he’s getting hungry and it’s 25 cent hotdog wednsday, so we chopup a full
onion at my house cry a little and go down to the schnitz and have 4 mustard
dogs each for 2 dollars, harry says it’s on him since he’s staying at my place,
but oh no he left the house too fast
and left his wallet at home. Ok harry
you get it next time.

7)Next on the wednsday ritual like any true
comics nerd will tell you is it’s new comics day. I’ve been buying less and less
comics since I got out of jail but I still can’t help it, all those dudes you
went to high school with that could draw like mother fuckers that used to end up
in comics . now they all work at pixar or video game companies. The only people
left reading and making comics are people like me who grew up reading this shit,
never stopped and now are making them all fucked up so only adults can read
them. yes!!! But anyways it doesn’t really matter where I’m at if I’m in new
york I hit jim hanleys by the empire state building, when I’m in the yay yereo,
comic relief, when I’m in la. Hideeho, goldenapple , or meltdown depending
onwhere I’m staying at, and it’s been that way since high school. Today I should
have stayed home, I get there nothing good is out, but I end up getting the
avengers because the guy that’s writing it right now is killing off all these
old school characters like scarlet witch and hawkeye and fanboys are getting
pissed. I get home and read the avengers see a piece of artwork that I let
warner brothers use for the inside liner notes of the jay-z linkin park album,
and see that they went ahead and used it for an entire ad campaign, the next few
hours I’m on the phone with
the worst people on the planet, l.a.
entertainment lawyers , the only worse people are tobacco lawyers, I don’t have
the stomach for this verbal sparring I want to puke my hotdogs, I’m a fucking
artist , these guys are professional put words in your mothers and word
twisterer’s . I need a fucking lawyer this is gonna be a long day, long month ,
year.

8) This is one of the gayest things ever, but right now there
is a double rainbow outside but it makes me happy.The rest of the night will
only get better.

9)Mylious the drummer for pink and guch the drummer
for insolence stop by the studio and I give them a drawing I did of a drumset
for their drumming dvd ,kidguch, how are they gonna pay me? They are both
sponsored drummers so they said I can go down to lemmon percussion on the
alameda and pick out any drumset that sonor makes, fuck yes, I wish everything
in life worked out like this. I draw a drum set, I get a drum set, I draw a girl
I get a girl I draw a fat burger I get a fatburger.never having to ever deal
with money again would be a blessing.

10)I go down to the drum shop ,
they’re closed but I salivate in front of the window of what I’ll soon be
getting,

11)I see that there’s a drum clinic next door with Kenny
aranoff, arguably one of the best studio and touring musicans ever has played
with everyone from Jessica simpson to the smashing pumpkins and everyone in
between , next door is my friend Johnny granado’ 5 color cowboy
hair salon
it’s packed in and Kenny is in the middle of a half hour drum solo which
destroyed my brain, it was sick as fuck. After the show we get to hang out in
the back room, and Kenny tells me really entertainingly about his failed
marriage and kids,he seems to have all the same problems as me , even though
he’s in his early 40’s. fuuuuuuck I think to myself, I’m 28 now and I keep
thinking by the time I’m 30 or 35 all this shit will start to make sense, I had
the best girl in the world and I let her go because I’m a fucking idiot and my
foolish pursuit to be the greatest artist in the world, and the guy tells me
guys like you and me are not built that way, if you want to be the best at
whatever it is you do, art , drumming, your gonna be a
shitty dad and
husband, if you try to be both or try to find this imaginary balance that
everyone keeps talking about , you’re gonna fail and be miserable at the same
time. Fucking greaaaat.
Do I want to be the best artist in the world, or do
I want to be a cool boyfriend? It was totally unexpected to meet Kenny tonight.I
end up driving past my ex-girlfriends house a few times with harry sitting
shotgun saying I shouldn’t , I didn’t take any pictures because I want to
/>protect her address and I was too busy stalking.

12)It’s about 11
pm now and we head over to steve caballero’s house for art night. Steve has
people over about once a week when he’s in town for art night, he’s one of the
most unstoppable characters I’ve ever seen, a skate legend, but when not doing
that, he’s touring with his band the faction, doing motorcross , or painting and
drawing it’s like a train, get on or get off, steve has a kid too and got
divorced last year, I tell him what Kenny told me, and he says back all the same
things, shit is looking grim if I couldn’t work shit out with mylan I don’t
think I’m ever gonna get married. Even though it’s art night we end up just
talking and playing ping pong, it’s like a dude’s version of a sewing circle.
/>
It’s past midnight , I missed loveline tonight, I got a lot to think
about, I want to drive by andstalk my ex again and then crawl into bed and sleep
forever, but there’s lots more to do.

13)We stop at my cousin alex’s
and pick up some more blanket’s for harry because it’s cold at my place and I
see one of the best things in the universe, my nephew Brandon is playing with
cars and then all of a sudden just falls asleep on the stairs.

Next I
have to drive out twenty minutes to palo alto to clean up a paint spill and a
few touch up’s on the mural I been working on for the facebook ,so I burn a disc
real fast for late night painting . I have to take in consideration that I’m
working late at night so I need music that soothes yet energizes and also the
fact that I’ll be alone allows me to add guilty pleasures that I’d otherwise be
embarrassed as fuck if they walked in on me. But besides those few exceptions my
musical taste is indestructible.Duff mckagan 10 years, rattatat 17 years, izzy
stradlin pressure drop, ennio morricone (last song on the mssion
soundtrack),robotech-boobytrap, Body count -there goes the neighborhood, DMX -
party up in here, eazy -e real mutha fucking g’s, esg -you make no sense, sick
of it all -sanctuary, distillers-beat your heart out,tatu -all the things she
said, mike watt and sonic youth-get into the groove, fatlip-whats up fatlip,
boxer -georgia, ucla marching band drum squad vs. usc marching band drum squad,
optimo -liquid liquid, aphex twin- alberto balsam,desparecidos-manana,john
fruciante-murderers,temple of the dog- hunger strike, fugazi- provisional,pepe
deluxe-indifference,concrete blonde- everybody knows, pixies -honey pie
T.I.Rubberbandman-instrumental, sepultura and pavoratti- roots bloody roots,
casino soundtrack -theme de Camille, guns n roses -you aint the first, Julie
delpy -before sunrise soundtrack, RX Queen -deftones, blink 182 -the fallen
interlude..
I grab the disc and leave my computer on to keep downloading
porn and head out to palo alto.
I even have a special detective assigned to
my case in palo alto to make sure I clean up my spill,
Heres an email from
Phil

You are hereby notified that it has been determined that a
painter,
> contracted by you to paint in your leased space at 471 Emerson
Street, is
> responsible for the spilling of some white paint on the
pavement in a
> parking space on the Emerson Street frontage of your
building.  The
> spilling of this material is a violation of Palo Alto
Municipal Code
> Section 5.20.160.
>
> You are requested to
provide the name, address and telephone number of the
> responsible
painter.  Code Enforcement will contact this individual and
> request a
cleanup of this paint.  Ultimately, if compliance is not
> achieved by this
painter, you and your company will be responsible to
> clean up this paint. 
At that point, an Administrative Citation may be
> issued to you.  This
citation has a $250 fine associated with it and this fine is assessed daily.
/>The guy that hired me to paint thefacebook.com offices, is sean parker he’s
only 25 and was one of the founders of napster fucking brilliant guy. It takes
me two and a half hours of back breaking work to clean up the spill,

/>14) I never thought I would ever in my life purchase a product called graffiti
remover, but I did, and It works like a dream. Phil will be happy..

/>15)My head is fucking killing me from the fumes of paint thinner and graphitti
remover I almost crash the mini van, my knuckles are bleeding and I really need
to take a shower. I don’t have a shower at my loft only a kitchen and public
toilet, so I either go swimming at the condo’ next door or go to 24 hour fitness
and use the public showers for my hygene.

16)it’s past three in the
morning and the same guy has this shift every night yet he still asks to see my
id every time. This part of my life is still identical to prison life, I shower
every other day in a public bath with 5 to 10 other guys just like in Tokyo ,
but it’s late tonight and it’s only me, harry, and a fat Mexican dude , he had
the nuts the size of spaldings I had to wait for him to finish scrubbing those
things before I could take this picture.another problem is it’s been a year
since I got a chance to do any manscaping and without the privacy of my own
shower I didn’t get a chance to trim the pubes and their getting pretty long,
will have to remind myself to pack scissors on my next trip.

We eat
pancakes and mini burgers at the only place open this late in san jose, denny’s
and then we get home as the sun is about to come up .I feel like a monster right
now . not like a scary one, though at one time I did, I’m more like a sad ghost
or Korean vampire, how I ended up like this
I don’t know. I’m like this art
fag that only exists at night . it’s been like this for awhile but it’s gotten
really bad this year.besides tonight, I never talk to anyone anymore, people
that hang out around me always are wearing masks because I’m painting with toxic
chemicals, I hardly leave my cave. I’m only awake when everyone else is
sleeping, it seems quieter and like the world is less populated. I feel like I’m
slipping between the cracks. I often wonder what would have happened to me if
the whole art thing didn’t work out for me. I’ve totally turned into this fat
typical depressed neurotic self loathing art fag. But I can remember being
hungry . I can remember the first time getting a rejection letter from a
magazine getting rejected from a gallery . the anger and the fire that ,that
rejection created inside me like I was fucking nothing, like I didn’t matter. I
was so angry then I wanted to destroy everything that made people feel safe, I
wanted to terrorize America I wanted to throw the first rock and start a
revolution , anarchy and riots all the way people would listen to me, but then I
sold my first expensive painting and bought a car ,and everything changed.
People like Hitler and charles manson real monsters, yet human, how did they
become like this? Rejection, Hitler’s paintings were
rejected everywhere,
and mansons songwriting skills were laughed at. With all that hate and anger I
funneled into my art, what kind of monster would I have been now, if not for
success?
There is an Indian family living underneath me illegally in a
place of business, I don’t want to but I have to , especially after a day like
this.

17)I drum my heart out, the loudest fucking drumbeat ever for
about ten minutes till I drum myself to sleep. I beat off twice ,read two more
comics and finally fall asleep at 8.

18) here’s everything I’ve
painted since January.

Check out David’s website href="http://www.davidchoe.com/">here