« An Amazing Interview With Cost and Revs for 1994 | Main | Edinburgh | October 27 | ‘Before The Birds Stop Singing’ »
October 11, 2005
"The Tour DeLee" What the Fuck?
Yikes.First, you gotta understand:
1. We're ready to support anyone who's willing to donate their talents to raising money for any natural disaster - be it Katrina, the earthquake in Pakistan, the Asian Tsunami....you name it.
2. We fuckin' love Lee Quinones.
But....
Publicists and copywriters suck!
They can turn even the coolest guys and the best intentions into absolute fucking bullshit. They can make an event that probably has good intentions into something that sounds so inauthentic, so sacarine, so ridiculous, that you want to vomit all the person next to you.
Case in point....
"Tour DeLee"
From the "Tour DeLee" website:
"World- renowned contemporary artist Lee Quinones has created a historical benevolent project to raise money to aid children and their families affected by Hurricane Katrina. Lee will depart Brooklyn, NY on October 27, 2005 and ride a custom made bicycle about thirty-five days and nearly 1,600 miles to Miami Beach, FL to raise money for this cause. En route, in addition to raising proceeds and awareness for the ongoing need for financial assistance to Katrina's victims, Lee will create original artwork to grace the frame work of his bicycle, which Brooklyn Machine Works (B.M.W.) [www.brooklynmachineworks.com], an internationally renowned custom bike fabrication firm, has committed to making for Lee's long journey to Florida.
Upon Lee's arrival in Miami, the illustrious South Miami Beach hot spot, Buck15 [www.buck15.com], will premier Lee Quinones' solo art exhibit during the acclaimed Miami Art Basel [www.artbasel.com] on December 2nd, 2005. The show will feature newly created sketches as well as the painted and autographed custom B.M.W. bike that Lee rode to Florida. While Lee's various sketches will be excluded from the auction, the bike will be auctioned off to the highest bidder as part of Lee's extensive personal contribution to this cause.
At the conclusion of the Art Basel, a press conference will be held to present our partnership charity, Boys & Girls Clubs of America, with a check for 100% of the proceeds accrued from corporate and private donations made for Lee's physical journey to Florida, as well the bike auction monies to ensure it's direct distribution to Katrina's survivors. The Mayors of Miami, New Orleans and Biloxi will be invited to attend this historical culmination.
In addition to Lee's international reputation, this charitable event will attract Art Basel attendees and notable members of Miami's elite community by embracing the festive vibes that only the boutique venue Buck15 and an accompanying celebrity DJ could bring. Lee's exhibit will extend through the Miami Art Basel and into Art Miami, running through mid-January, 2006
Of the funds collected for BGCA's Hurricane Relief fund, 100% will go to aid the young people whose lives have been disrupted by Hurricane Katrina. Your support will make a crucial difference to thousands of kids at a critical and frightening time in their lives."
Okay...
So we've made a point to try not to be negative on the Wooster site. But this website made us want to fuckin' retch all over the place. Lee Quinones is a graffiti artist for fuck sake, not some cheesy two bit actor who needs to get on Entertainment Tonight. As much as people complain about ad agencies co-opting graf, here's an example of a publicist taking a cool guy like Lee Quinones and making him seem like Ashton Kutcher or Scott Baio, or Willie Ames, or something like that. This website is so theatrical, that - for us - it drove us nuts.
Here goes:
"... a historical benevolent project"...
Who came up with this phrase?:
"a historical benevolent project?!"
Yikes.
".... Lee will create original artwork to grace the frame work of his bicycle"...
Grace the frame?...Artwork gracing a bike frame?... Huh?!
"... the illustrious South Miami Beach hot spot, Buck15 [www.buck15.com], will premier Lee Quinones' solo art exhibit during the acclaimed Miami Art Basel [www.artbasel.com] on December 2nd, 2005"
"illustrious".... "hot spot"...
Words like these make it sound like the cheesiest place on earth.
".... The Mayors of Miami, New Orleans and Biloxi will be invited to attend this historical culmination"...
Gotta love lines like this one... The mayors of Miami, New Orleans and Biloxi are "invited" to attend. Don't they have better things to do? "Invited" is a common bullshit term in press releases that allow a publicist to connect someone to an event that they would never attend in a million years.. You can "invite" fuckin' anyone to anything. It means nothing. I'll bet anyone $100,000 that they won't attend.
"... this charitable event will attract Art Basel attendees"...
We get it. We get it. It's for charity, it's not to promote the Brooklyn Machine Works bike. We get it, already.
"... this charitable event will attract Art Basel attendees and notable members of Miami's elite community by embracing the festive vibes that only the boutique venue Buck15 and an accompanying celebrity DJ could bring"
Okay... This is the line that induced bile to move up from our stomich to our throat. (Luckily, we caught it before it came out out mouths.) What the fuck does Miami's "elite" community have to do with a graffiti artist? "Elite community"? Who the fuck would use words like "elite community"?
So here's our advice....
If you're a really cool graffiti artist, a legend.... Please... please... don't let this happen to you.
Please don't let a copywriter or publicist turn you into a joke. We'll still support the "Tour DeLee" because it's for a good cause and we love Lee Quinones.
But...
Graf and copywriting.... Keep 'em separate, okay?
Posted by marc at 10:26 PM in | Recommend this! (1) |
|